Friday, July 20, 2018

from a Tuesday at home.

the boys are in Tyler with my mom
having the time of their lives with their cousins
yesterday before they left Townes told me that they were going because, "me and Bubby have never seen Beau and Luke in lots of years". so they went

it's just me and baby girl.
and Woodrow and Poe Dameron (Townes' fish that he got for his birthday)
and Rosie, the Roomba, who sounds very much alive right now. bumping into everything and driving Woodrow crazy.

sister girl just ate, so she's incredibly relaxed and making the best company for this rainy, overcast day.


i went back to work last week. 
let me clarify. 
i'm working a few hours during July.
Nothing crazy. 
Just getting back into the swing of things and helping out at the clinic.
but, it's along enough to miss Kirby Jane and the boys.

so i'm enjoying this slow morning at home.
although it's been a productive morning so far!
currently, i'm staring at our home and the insurmountable task of putting it back in order.
we moved back in last Wednesday.
well, we didn't move everything back in. we started sleeping here.
there is still a lot of stuff/clothes at my parents that i need to get.
we are slowly putting things away, cleaning, sorting, throwing away, selling, etc.
bit by bit, i suppose.
although i'd really like it all to *poof* be magically completed.

do you ever feel so overwhelmed by a task at hand that you do nothing?
i do.
a lot.
and that's kind of where i'm finding myself lately.
mostly, in relation to the house.
so i just start with one pile of stuff and move on to the next.
or one room.
the kitchen is clean, so i move on to the boys room, then to our closet, then the laundry room, and so on.
the hardest part is getting started. and not losing momentum.

i also feel this way when i hear of hard things that are happening.
i watched the news the other day.
i don't do that often, hardly ever.
my news source is Facebook, unfortunately and GT.

like most people, i felt overwhelmingly discouraged, angered, helpless, sad after watching the news.
so much tragedy, hatred, injustice, sadness in this world.
i thought how far removed i am from all of it.
as i sit in my home with my family, safe. protected. nourished. loved.
worried about my STUFF.

i could go (most likely) my entire life pretty sheltered from what i see on the news.
but, i don't want to.
i want to be aware of what's going on in our world.
and not aware to simply know.
but to be spurred to do something.

but how?
what does it look like to help or be involved in world issues when i'm home with my kids?
seriously, i'm asking this question.
i can justify my not doing anything right now by saying, "i'm raising little world changers", but how will they know how to if they don't see it demonstrated.

well, that's all i have for today.
probably not, but i'm stopping.
i don't have a solution to my rambling thoughts. they're only thoughts.
i'd love to hear your thoughts or ideas. seriously...